I am an poly, ENM, and kink friendly coach. About ten years ago I started questioning traditional monogamous relationship styles. I had been a serial monogamist for twenty years, but something didn’t quite feel right. As I started to research and explore the areas of polyamory and ethical non-monogamy, I gained a tremendous amount of understanding into myself. It forced me to confront insecurities, better my communication, and dive deep into what I truly wanted and needed out of relationships. I have had several different relationship structures over the past 10 years of exploration, and all have had their challenges and benefits. As a coach, I’ve helped many couples in ENM relationships using my experience. If you are struggling with the difficulties of polyamory and ENM, but believe in its benefits, I am here to help!

What is polyamory and non-monogamy coaching?

Non-monogamy coaching is a specialized form of coaching that supports individuals and couples who are exploring or practicing non-monogamous relationships. It focuses on providing tools, strategies, and guidance to navigate the unique challenges and opportunities that come with these relationship styles.

Here are some key aspects of non-monogamy coaching:

Areas of Focus:

• Communication and boundaries: Setting clear and honest communication, establishing healthy boundaries, and navigating complex conversations.

• Jealousy and insecurity: Exploring the root causes of jealousy, developing coping mechanisms, and fostering trust and security in non-monogamous relationships.

• Relationship dynamics: Understanding different non-monogamous relationship structures, managing multiple partners, and navigating potential conflicts.

• Self-discovery: Exploring one's values, desires, and identity in the context of non-monogamy, and building self-acceptance and confidence.

• Emotional management: Recognizing and processing emotions like jealousy, disappointment, and joy, and developing healthy coping mechanisms.

• Decision-making and goal setting: Determining what type of non-monogamy aligns with one's values and goals, making informed decisions about partners and relationships, and setting clear intentions.

Benefits of Non-Monogamy Coaching:

• Increased self-awareness and understanding of non-monogamy.

• Improved communication and conflict resolution skills.

• Development of healthy coping mechanisms for jealousy and insecurity.

• Stronger and more fulfilling non-monogamous relationships.

• Increased confidence and self-acceptance.

• Greater clarity and alignment with one's values and goals in relationships.

Who can benefit from non-monogamy coaching:

• Individuals considering or exploring non-monogamy.

• People already in non-monogamous relationships who are facing challenges.

• Individuals who want to improve their communication and conflict resolution skills within their non-monogamous relationships.

• Anyone seeking support and guidance in navigating the emotional complexities of non-monogamy.

• Throuples, those in ENM relationships, other non-monogamous relationships or those considering non-monogamy.

Non-monogamy coaching can provide valuable support and guidance for individuals and couples navigating the complexities of non-monogamous relationships. By working with a qualified coach, you can gain the tools and skills needed to build healthy, fulfilling, and authentic connections.

Here are some additional resources you may find helpful:

• The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy

• More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory by Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert

How does it differ from therapy?

Coaching is similar, but distinct from therapy. While both can involve exploring personal challenges, coaching focuses on future-oriented growth, while therapy delves deeper into past experiences and healing.

How does it work and when will I see results?

There's no one-size-fits-all answer to how long it takes to see results in personal development coaching. It depends on a variety of factors, including:

Your specific goals: Are you aiming for a small, achievable improvement in one area, or a major transformation across multiple aspects of your life? Bigger goals naturally take longer to reach.

Your starting point: How much self-awareness and action do you already have in place? If you're starting from scratch, there might be more foundational work to do before you see significant shifts.

Your commitment and consistency: How actively do you engage with the coaching process? Do you regularly implement the strategies and practices discussed? The more invested you are, the faster you'll see progress.

However, to give you a general idea, here's a possible range:

• Small shifts and improvements: You might notice these within weeks or even days, especially if you're working on specific skills or behaviors. For instance, feeling more confident in communication or managing your time more effectively.

• Significant progress towards goals: This could take 3-6 months, especially if it involves changing ingrained patterns or tackling complex challenges. You might see breakthroughs in areas like career advancement, overcoming limiting beliefs, or building stronger relationships.

• Transformational change: This is a deep shift in your overall outlook and way of being, often involving multiple areas of your life. It's the most time-intensive, potentially taking 6 months to a year or even longer. You might experience a newfound sense of purpose, radical self-acceptance, or the ability to navigate life with more ease and joy.

Remember, these are just estimates. Some people experience rapid progress, while others need more time. The key is to stay committed, trust the process, and celebrate even the small wins along the way.

What does it cost?

I work on a sliding scale. Sessions typically cost $100 - $200 per session. Schedule with me for details.

Are you trained or certified in coaching?

Yes, I graduated the Human Potential Institute Coaching program, and am on track to obtain PCC credentials from International Coaching Federation (ICF). I have a BA in psychology from UNLV.